UPDATE: my husband passed away this morning at 11:22 a.m. Life will go on, but it is forever changed…
I’m going to be taking a break from blogging, perhaps an extended one. It’s 3:54 on Monday morning and I’m writing through a blur of tears as I sit in a hospital room as my dear, sweet husband of 37 years swiftly fades away.
Early Sunday morning he suffered a massive brain bleed and life became a whirlwind of ambulances, emergency rooms, phone calls and texts to relatives and the words you never want to hear — there is literally nothing we can do and chances of survival are about 3 percent.
My children who live close by gathered around and we talked and cried and tried to make some decisions. I stayed overnight because I could not bear to leave. I slept a few hours before the ICU nurse woke me to tell me his blood pressure had dropped significantly and he had spiked a high fever. Still, there’s really nothing to do but wait and cry and feel my heart breaking.
We’ve had such a wonderful life together. I know I’m very lucky and not everyone is blessed as I have been. I just thought we’d have more time. I want to thank you all in advance for your love and support and prayers because I’m not sure I’ll have the time or ability
t respond to comments. I love you all, too and I’m so grateful for your friendship.
Will you take the time to know me
Beyond the secret of my curves
I’ll return the favor
And explore your attributes…
Will you celebrate life’s wonders
Let me see it in your eyes
That you couldn’t live without me
You’d never want to try…
Will you stay with me forever
Or as long as time allows
You see, I can’t release you
I’m afraid I don’t know how…
The one sad note on our Hawaiian vacation happened early Wednesday morning while we were in Maui when my kids got a panicked call from their house sitter that their English bulldog, Tank, had passed away. (Yep, JP’s dog!)
He was a sweet and silly bully who wasn’t obviously ill when we all left on vacation, but he was 8 years old and bulldogs are not generally a long-lived breed. The lifespan is about 7 to 10 years and he was 8 back in November.
They are all missing him, as are we, but they gave him a wonderful life and we were honored to be his family all these years…
I’m not sure if this is a particular format, I just like the way the six words per line flowed…
Peering up through lowered lashes, wary
Your eyes meet mine, you wink…
Confused, I glance away, cheeks berry
Then search for hints of lies
You smile, but I see questions
Hidden within those deep dark eyes
Nervous, I bite my lower lip
I know you know I’m afraid
Feel my pulse, a racing clip
Always treasure my heart and feelings
You’ll be so careful, you plead
Whispered chance, my mind is reeling…
Photo from Pixabay
Makes the heart grow fonder
or so they say
Then why does mine feel