I’ve been a widow now for almost a year. Still hating it. I even hate the word. Thanksgiving will be the last holiday of this year of firsts to go through (although I was still pretty numb and don’t really remember much of last Christmas.)
We will celebrate together with my family on Christmas Eve and then youngest and I will break tradition and go to Virginia Beach to spend Christmas Day through New Year’s with my sister and her family.
Most days I’m stunned when I realize it’s been nearly a year since my husband died suddenly last December 3. It just can’t be possible, yet it is.
Some days I’m afraid I’m not handling things well, but I do get up every day, put on makeup (mostly), pay bills, run errands, cook dinner, work out three days a week. So I guess I’m doing okay, right?
Many things are still undecided. I want to find a permanent place to live and continue helping youngest train toward finding a job. Find myself a purpose in life, maybe get a dog again once I’m settled. Maybe combine those two things and train a dog for visits at hospitals and/or senior centers.
I need to write again. Maybe travel. Find joy in life again. Move forward. Move forward without feeling guilty…
Thank you so much for sticking with me and reading my posts, however few and far between, even when I don’t always read yours and comment. I’m doing the best I can, really I am.
Wishing you all a lovely holiday season.
Photo of the Grand Canyon is mine.
Kat Myrman at Mercury Colliding has provided another interesting photo prompt for a very short story of no more than 280 characters. My first impression of this picture was that it reminded me of marionettes. So here’s my entry this week and you can read all the entries and/or join in by visiting Kat’s site.
Papa, it’s wonderful!
Well, it’s not everyday that a prince turns 10, now is it?
May I make the puppets move?
Puppets? Oh, no, son, they’re not toys. They’re tiny subjects I had created just for you. Now, be gentle —
I’m making this one fly!
Wilhelm, no — his arm!
Luck and lust enveloped us
We were high rollers riding the crest
Doubling down with no worries
Always covering the spread
Vegas was our mecca, baby
Endless lights, pulsing excitement
So blinding that no one noticed
The shell of diamonds was really just paste
We partied in the desert
Washed down a Special K with Dom Perignon
Made breakfast even sweeter
As it tickled and teased and excited
Then warm days became summer and our oasis
Dried up, hot and unforgiving
Luck evaporated with the relentless sunshine
Like champagne puddles in the desert heat
Our love gasped for air as we tried to find
Cool and clean breaths like the night we met
When life was new and fresh
As the breeze after a gentle rainfall
We were supposed to be soul mates
Woven together into sumptuous velvet nights
Now, I make my escape alone, while
You and Vegas glitter in my rearview mirror…
Picture courtesy of my dear friend sonofabeach96. Please check out his wonderful photography here.
There once was a girl in the Midwest
Whose life sometimes felt like a test.
She’d found her good health was precarious
Every twinge she proclaimed the scariest
Till her doctor begged, “Give it a rest!
I actually wrote this awhile ago but it seemed appropriate now because I have a bone density test and mammogram later today, or as I like to call it, the Great Depression! Just a routine check up, nothing is wrong…
Will you take the time to know me
Beyond the secret of my curves
I’ll return the favor
And explore your attributes…
Will you celebrate life’s wonders
Let me see it in your eyes
That you couldn’t live without me
You’d never want to try…
Will you stay with me forever
Or as long as time allows
You see, I can’t release you
I’m afraid I don’t know how…