Bethany sat near the window, letting the small patch of sunlight warm her. Eyes closed, her thoughts drifted to the day their first son arrived. She had gripped Rod’s hands as one contraction after another left her gasping. “Just breathe, sweetheart,” he’d soothed. “Did you pick your focal point? It’s okay, squeeze as hard as you want.” Always her rock.
The beeping machines brought her back to the present. Shadows lengthened and the hospital room felt colder. Tears fell as she gripped Rod’s motionless hand, tubes and machines keeping him alive. She stroked his graying hair. “Please, sweetheart, just breathe.”
###
My theme this year is 100 word stories (so, no, don’t count this line.)
Oh, how words are meaningless without the context. Great piece.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much!
LikeLike
It’s so difficult to tell a tale in such few words. But you have managed to do that very beautifully! Great post. Well written!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much. It’s been both easier and more difficult in some ways!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know what you mean! 😊 I written micro-fiction too. At first, it was very difficult but after a while it gets easier. Even though I still suffer at times! 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow. Emotional. I’m bawling.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aww, sorry! Letter C will be fun, I promise!
LikeLike
Oh my! This was so good (and sad) – an excellent 100 words story. 😢
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Meg! I’m enjoying these although they are both easier and more difficult to write!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know exactly what you mean! It’s a great exercise in being concise, though!
LikeLiked by 1 person
It is and forcing my imagination into overdrive!
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s awesome, then!
LikeLike
Excellent writing and really powerful in just 100 words. Well done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much . I’m finding it easier in some ways and more difficult in others to write just 100 words!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Laura!
LikeLike
A lovely, emotional story, Diane, which you told so well in only 100 words. You evoked the scene in that hospital room perfectly and really drew me in. Well done!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Millie, I love your feedback!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m doing my best at going one day w/o tears and that didn’t help…But it was really good so I’ll shed a few for you but then I’ll get busy with the day. Love ya, Mz. D and loving your challenge post. Mine are a bit long but it’s a process 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Patty! (Shorter is easier!) Tomorrow mine will be more fun…
LikeLike
It’s Good ❤
LikeLike
This actually made me tear up. So well-written.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I’m hoping for a nice variety through the alphabet. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m sure they’ll be great. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yours, too!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am good at bitching. Ha!
LikeLike
The best 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great piece of microfiction. Choked me up.
http://bit.ly/2otD1C9
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, thank you, Alex!
LikeLike
I felt as though you were in a hospital room with me 15 years ago only Andrew was my son not my husband.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m so sorry, Bernadette. That must have been horrible for you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh my! so sad
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, I nearly cried. You’re an excellent writer. ❤️
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aww, thank you, Jess!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome. ❤️
LikeLike
Hey, thanks for including me in the lyrics challenge. I need to do that. I’ve been so busy getting our lake property ready to sell (listed it last Tuesday) and now I’m starting to pack up this house. Not much time for writing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
No worries, do it whenever you have time or not at all, whatever is best for you! Moving is a full time job 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha, yes ma’am. I knew we had a lot of stuff, but MAN!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hmm – the title of this piece looks rather familiar.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wait, what?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wrote this whole long story called Breathe last month.
Maybe you missed it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, no, I remember now. Yep, total plagiarism 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Title Plagiarism!!
That’s a thing, right? 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha, I’m sure no one has used breathe in a title before. Do I have to pay you some royalty now??
LikeLiked by 1 person
Royalties? Nah. Just bow deferentially, Dee – that should do it. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha, maybe a little cutesy. We’ll see 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha – now that I’d like to see. 🙂
Keep smiling.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh crap I meant curtsy. Ducking autocorrect 🙄
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha – that ducking excuse again! 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Absolutely beautiful. Brings my memories rushing back. So very good.❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are so kind to say that! Thank you so much xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are most welcome. Go Cubbies (just for you ❤️)
LikeLike
Aww, I’m so hoping!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Awesome! I wish that I had the gift of quality FF!
Marquessa @simplymarquessa from
Simply Marquessa
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, sweetie! I’m loving your Hawaii story, too!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Powerful in so few words. Well done!
LikeLike
Wow, great stuff. And complete. In just 100 words. Remarkable. That was a great story with such a beautiful juxtaposition. I’m glad I’ll get to go straight to C, so this one won’t linger too long in my mind … I hope.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, I’m mixing it up with romance, mystery, maybe even a little horror!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a beautiful, heart wrenching puce l piece
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much. You are very nice to say that!
LikeLike
Piece * sorry autocorrect
LikeLike
Hmmm I sure hope he takes that breath!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
In my mind, he wakes up!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Mine too!
LikeLike
Ah, heartbreaking. So much emotion for so few words. Nicely written!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, sweetie!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Intense! beautifully written.
Moon
https://aslifehappens60.wordpress.com
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks so much, I’m glad you liked it!
LikeLike
A whole love story written in 100 words. This pulled at my heartstrings–just lovely.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Steph! I think it might be a scenario we all can relate to with a parent, spouse or child.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, we sure can.
LikeLike
[…] My theme this year is 100 word fiction. This is a continuation of B is for Breathe which you can read here. […]
LikeLiked by 1 person