Spatter…

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The party had been winding down anyway and the flirty blonde in the short black dress suggested her place, so she and Mike were grabbing their coats from the back bedroom when they heard the sounds of glass breaking and people shouting.  Then the lights went out.  The blonde had opened her mouth but before she could start shrieking he’d pulled her close and shoved her face into his chest to try to muffle a scream.  She’d shoved him away hard like she was afraid and he felt her run past him in the darkness as he slipped and now he wasn’t even sure where she was…

What the hell? Mike could feel the toe of his boot hit something as he stumbled in the darkness to find the light switch. God dammit but his head hurt. He must have hit the back of his head against the footboard of the bed as he fell.  Christ, he hadn’t meant to scare the girl, he just figured if a fight had broken out or something they could just stay in the bedroom till everybody settled down.  He’d only been in Jim and Sara’s apartment a few times so he wasn’t sure he was remembering right, but, yeah, there was the switch to the right of the door.

As the light clicked on, he looked out into the living room and saw splatters of red everywhere, like a paint can had flown from someone’s hand and liquid curved up into the air in slow motion then fell like rain drops in a mesmerizing pattern. Looking more closely, he realized the red was too thin, too dark, had a coppery smell — good Lord, it was blood. Blood everywhere.

Squinting against the bright light, he could make out the pale, shocked faces of Jim and his wife, Sara, and another guy he remembered from the party, Leo maybe — no, Logan, somebody who worked with Jim at the trucking company. They were all staring at him in horror. Then Sara started screaming and screaming and he looked down and there was the blonde in the short black dress, glossy red lips and blue eyes open wide as blood spurted from the slash across her neck and soaked into the light gray carpet…

~~~

I mentioned that I was interested in writing a scene like this just for fun and Matthew from Twisted Roads of Madness suggested a scenario of a body on the floor and four people and blood everywhere!   What do you think?

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64 responses

  1. Wow, that’s really grisly, but good. I like that you can keep your distinctive writing voice in something so different.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, thanks for saying that! I like trying new stuff out but this one was hard for me to even imagine 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. No, it was really good. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. It was kind of fun to write!

        Like

  2. Very dark and disturbing! I liked it!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Deliciously dark! lol

        Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s now a who done it. You’ll have to continue the story. 😃

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks, it was fun! Maybe I can end it…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s a perfect setup. 😃

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You’re very welcome. 😊

        Like

  4. Ooh, very visual and well written Diane. You had me hooked …

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I liked it very very much , I was “watching” the scene rolling !
    Turtle Hugs

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes! A walk on the dark side! Isn’t it fun? And I agree, keep going! Excellent writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I really enjoyed it. It is a classic whodunit 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I love mysteries and with mysteries the beginning is so important. This grabs you and brings you right in!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, thank you! I enjoy playing with different types of stories 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. What an amazing smash! I loved it, there was so many ways you could go about this one, what you did was glorious, descriptive, bloody, violent, and best of all, you didn’t solve it all for the reader. The classic, what happened next question leaves the hook, you don’t need to ever revisit this one if you don’t want to, because it’s perfect 👍

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, thanks, Matthew! This was way harder for me to write than I thought it would be. But I had fun trying something different that you do so well!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You can’t tell, it looks like you had fun with it, centering on the main character and not what happened. It was a great ride, I really enjoyed it, and if half my stuff is enjoyed by others as much as I enjoyed yours then I’d be well happy with that result 👍

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Paula, trying something new!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. As I read it, it played out like the opening scene of a Law & Order episode in my mind. Really good scene description.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much, I’m so glad you liked it!

      Like

  11. Wow!! I like it! Are you thinking of writing more to this scene or even expanding it?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maybe not this one in particular, but I’d like to do more mystery/thriller type stuff as part of a bigger write, so I’m practicing! I’m so glad you like it!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. WOW, certainly not what I was expecting, but excellent writing. I’m proud of you for venturing into a new area and for doing it so successfully! Congrats.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! I do like trying new things …

      Like

  13. A perfect scene! Please write more. I’m an ardent fan of thrillers and mysteries… 😀

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m planning to. This is a very new area for me. Thanks so much, I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Another vote to keep it going!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Very different from your other writing! I was shocked and scared! Awesome job

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, I wanted to try something different. It’s harder to write than I thought!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I was shocked!! I was waiting for romance so was really surprised.I liked it

        Like

  16. Do you know when you write how you want this to end? It is very intriguing and I liked it a lot! I wrote a creepy murder story but it was already “fixed” in who had done it! I think it is called, “All that Remains.”
    What a fantastic scene and perfectly set up and open-ended, Dee. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! No, I really did not end this one. I think I could find an ending, but I just liked the scene when I wrote it glad you liked, now I want to go on her and read yours!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Mine was last year and not sure I can ever find it. Sometimes it will randomly show up someone commented on it.
        ❤ Dee, how did it go? I was surprised to see your comment dear but said prayers like crazy once an hour like clockwork. . . ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Not yet, next Tuesday. Tomorrow is my pre op testing, starting to feel more real now! Thanks for all your love and support, Robin!

        Like

  17. My eyes opened wider to take it all in.
    I feel that I know you better now.
    You have a lovely set of friends.
    Their comments are delicious.
    I agree with all of them.
    The pad of my feet and the snick of a closing door.
    A thought on the breeze – she is forever awesome.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Thank you, Robert! I do have a wonderful group of friends at WP. I’m so glad you read it and liked it. Practicing my horror/mystery/stalker writing. I like trying different things 🙂

    Like

  19. I was hooked from the beginning.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Steph! What is it about horror that we find so fascinating? Sometimes I’m grossed out and still keep reading, lol.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I know, right? And we want more. Hahaha 😆

        Liked by 1 person

  20. I think you were quite successful! Gory, but successful!! You really have a flair for writing, it’s enthralling and captivating. Your word choices are perfect and you always have my full attention to the very end and leave me wanting more. You are very talented!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. And you are so very nice to say that! Thank you so much. This one was tough for me, but interesting to try new things 🙂

      Like

  21. Absolutely mind blowing! You must continue this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are so sweet, Rashmi, I will write more like this!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Looking forward to it! 🙂

        Like

  22. This is great – right up my ally, Sis.

    Do it again!

    Liked by 1 person

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